Time to vent
I will start off my saying this blog will probably ramble. I'm more than a little frustrated, so I don't know how clear I will be. But, at least I can get it off my chest.
OK...where to start. I guess I will start with the first thing that ticked me off yesterday. Let's call my husband's exwife "L" to make things easier. For 2 years L said she was going to make an appointment for my stepdaughter (Chelsea) to see an orthodontist. Finally, I got tired of waiting (she is 13 now & needed braces badly) so I made an appointment for her. I took her to the evaluation, to the review, and to the subsequent 4 dentist appointments to get teeth pulled prior to getting her braces. I signed a contract agreeing to pay $1250.00 down and then $100.00 month thereafter for her braces.
On the day she actually got her braces, her Mom actually decided to take her. Fine. She paid $625.00 and we paid $625.00 that day...for the total down payment of $1250.00. We agreed to each pay half of everything.
Well, a couple of days ago I got a statement from the orthodontist showing that one of the payments of $625.00 had been removed and that we now owe $735.00 (that breaks down to the 625.00, 100.00 monthly payment, and 10.00 late fee.
So, I call the orthodontist to see what it up.
Apparently, when L took Chelsea in that day, she felt left out and asked to sign a contract too. Because I had already signed on for the downpayment, they divided the remaining balance and made 2 separate accounts. Only her's didn't require a downpayment. So they took the $625.00 she paid and applied it to her 100.00 monthly payments so that WE owe the whole downpayment ourselves. What in the heck is that about? How can that possibly be fair and reasonable from the perspective of the orthodontist?
I called them yesterday, they are researching and getting back to me today. But, I'm still mad. I always take care of everything and she comes behind me and screws everything up.
And that isn't all.
The kids got report cards yesterday. Chelsea is barely passing algebra. I set it up at the beginning of the year for her to get tutoring two times a week. Apparently it isn't helping much. Not to mention that she just doesn't care. She doesn't get it, so she doesn't study or try to learn it.
So, her teacher has recommended that she stay after school with her one afternoon a week. Ok, no real big deal, right? Now, bear in mind I pick my step kids up from school EVERY DAY. I get them to their practices & tutoring every day because L likes to sleep in so she goes in to work late and doesn't get off work until 6:00 or later.
There is a slight scheduling problem because Chelea's teacher wants us to pick her up at 4:00 which is the same time my boys get off the bus. My kids are too young (8 & 7) to come home to an empty house and it is impossible for me to be in 2 plays at one time.
So, Hubby asked L if she could arrange to pick Chelsea up from tutoring that one day a week. She actually said, "If that is what needs to happen, I will MAKE it happen. I seem to be the only one to ever take care of anything....I'd hate for you and Andrea to go out of your way."
WHAT?!?!??!?!?!??!?!??!?!?!??!
I can not tell you how hard it is for me this morning to not fire off an email to L and remind her of how much I go out of my way EVERY SINGLE DAY. I spend 1 hour 45 minutes of my day picking up her kids at school. I make all their doctor, dentist, and orthodontist appointments and get them there. I help them with their homework every day. I sign them up for their sports and on week days get them to every practice and game on time. In the meantime, I have my own kids to take care of, I work, and I go to school full time.
And she's saying I don't go out of my way?!?!?!!?!?!
OK, while not less frustrated I do feel a little calmer. Let's end on a more positive note....
Romans 8:31 What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?
posted by Andrea at 9:16 AM
4 Comments:
God loves you and I know that things will work out!
I have a wonderful stepson who apparently has a psycho for a mother. my hubby and i don't have custody of my stepson, but we have had some major problems with his mother regarding who is responsible for what and when and various other issues. i know it's hard dealing with other women when you are trying to do what's best for their child(ren). if you want to talk about it more, feel free to email me...my email's in my profile.
and just remember what a great thing you are doing for her children by welcoming them into your family and loving them as your own. you wouldn't do what you do for them if they weren't special to you.
I believe "L" may actually feel jealous of all you have. She may see that she can't really be as together or organized as you,so she hides behind "well placed or timed" comments.
Believe me, in a pinch, those kids and hubby knows who will pull through.
I also think you need to spell out the situation to the orthodontists office and since "L" is her biological mother, she should be more than responsible for half--after all,she doesnt' sound as if money was the issue, it was the issue that you took charge to get the orthodontics started.
Your doing a great job and God will continue to bless you for your faithfulness. As for the orthodontics, yes you go to them and make them adjust the balance. I have already dealt with these same issues with Jeff and his ex-wife. The doctors will try and do the easiest way out of billing, but when you make them correct their mistakes, they have to, they just don't want too.
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