Rambling thoughts

I have so many things on my mind right now, that I hardly know where to start......

Independence Day was a non-event for me. I worked that night & the night before so I slept most of the day. When I woke up, hubby has just walked in the door with a Frappicino from Starbucks. I wish I could wake up that way every day!! :-) I LOVE STARBUCKS!

Later in the day, I found myself washing dishes and just stopped. I had just worked 12 hours & was getting ready to go in for another 12. Hub & the kids had been off for 4 days...doing a whole lot of nothing. And I was the one doing dishes????

We are going to have to have a family meeting to discuss some changes that are going to have to take place now that mom is back at work.

My son's birthday is coming up soon, and my ex-husband's girlfriend has decided to throw him a party. I have VERY mixed feelings about this. On the logical hand, I am happy that she is interested in the kids and wants to be involved with them. But, on the emotional hand, they are MY kids. I can't help but feel like she is trying to be mom to them. Especially since she doesn't have kids of her own. And according to my son, she can't have kids. (which I didn't think I could either, come to think of it).

I don't know....I guess it is just my maternal instinct is feeling threatened. I hear little alarms going off in my head, that for now I suppose I will simply have to ignore. I will not allow myself to behave as my husband's ex did when I first entered the picture. And I do really believe that the more people my children have that love them, the better off they will be. I just better not hear them say, "We are supposed to call Christina, MOM, now...."

Another subject...

My husband was in the Army for 6 years...from 1989 to 1995. He was in a specialized unit in Army Intelligence. Since things have been heading up in Korea, he has been feeling the pull to reenlists. As with my kids and their dad's new girlfriend, I am not sure how I feel. I have so many conflicting emotions. One one hand, I feel like he's done his service for our country, and now it is time for other people to step up. On the other hand, I can understand his desire to contribute. He was very good at what he did and it is hard for him to just sit back and do nothing while there are so many potential threats out there. I know he thought about it after 9/11...but we'd only been married a few months at that point.

So, who knows. I finally agreed he should go talk to a recruiter and just see what they say. They may not take him at all because of his diabetes. (though I've read if you can show you can manage it thru diet & exercise alone they will let you in. And that is what he does---no meds). They may not be able to pay him enough for us to afford for him to be enlisted. From what I understand, he would have to take quite a pay cut.

Regardless, I will support whatever decision he makes.

Tomorrow I am taking the kids to Concord Mills Mall, near Charlotte. It is a big mall with a lot of neat stuff...Arcades, bass pro shops, movies, etc etc. I figured we'd just make a day of it. One day next week I want to take them to the pool, once it heats up again. Today it is only 76 and GLORIOUS. But, the heat will be back soon, I am sure.

God has wisely kept us in the dark concerning future events and reserved for himself the knowledge of them, that he may train us up in a dependence upon himself and a continued readiness for every event.

Matthew Henry